Sunday, May 23, 2010

ASK by Louis Evan Palmer


It's portrayed in film and books often enough and we all know of at least one person who's lived it. That is, where the man loves the woman who also loves him (quietly) but he never gets around to asking her to marry him and someone else does and she says “yes”. And when he (the first man) eventually talks to her, usually years later, about why she married so-and-so she will invariably say because he asked (and you didn't).

Nowadays, a woman can also ask more easily but may not for the same reasons. Uncertainty, fear of rejection, fear of commitment, etc. These things can be counter-acted by other fears – fear of loss, fear of loneliness, or by positive feelings like love. Yet love, it must be admitted, is always accompanied by fear. The Self always entwined with the Other.

Asking can be a complicated affair. It is flattering to be asked. This drives many interactions – for example, donors to a cause who often feel an obligation anyway. It reflects a commitment by the asker to the person being asked. It creates a situation where it can often be difficult for the person being asked to say “no”. But it does emphasize the importance of asking. The whole dynamic is set in motion by sincere asking.

This applies to otherworldly considerations as well – if you believe in other beings like angels or guardian spirits or beneficent entities. They may be there but you have to ask for their help.

If asking someone something is part of what you want then you should do it as soon as possible with honesty and good will. We must never look back and feel that it would have all been different if we had only asked.

Ask, Louis Evan Palmer, The Way It Can Be, hhtp://

Copyright 2010 Louis Evan Palmer lives in Ontario Canada. His short stories have appeared in numerous publications.